Rather, what struck me about this incident was the
Twitter conversation #YesAllWomen that sprung up shortly after the shooting and
has continued trending all week. The
conversation centered around the fact that obviously not all men sexually abuse
or kill women, but ALL women have dealt with gender discrimination, sexual harassment
and/or sexual abuse. You can check out
the conversation on Twitter here: https://twitter.com/hashtag/YesAllWomen?src=tren
I found this conversation to be disheartening. I already knew women are making less than men
with the same education and skills. I
knew rapes and sexual assaults occur more frequently than any of us know, and
often go unreported. And yes, I knew that women are oftentimes harassed,
catcalled, and taunted just for being women, but I hadn’t really thought about
the systematic, widespread culture that works against women on an everyday
basis. Yes – ALL women!So my question to you this week is two-fold: For the ladies – “Do you agree that all women face these kinds of issues? Have you had any experiences like the ones in #YesAllWomen that you would like to share?” For the men – “Do you feel like all men get a bad rap, based off the actions of a few? What do you think can be done to ensure equality in all aspects of life for both men and women?” Answers are due no later than Wednesday, June 4th, 2014.
To kick off the conversation, I’ll start! In college, unbeknownst to me, a guy followed
me home from the club one night. When he
knocked at my door, I thought it was a friend who had just dropped me off, so I
opened it. He was very drunk, and very
forceful in his demands that “I wanted it and had been asking for it all night.” Thankfully,
I was able to get out of his grasp and run outside where my screams alerted my
neighbors. I’d like to think that if I
had been raped that night, I would’ve instantly reported it and submitted to a
rape kit, but honestly, I’m not so sure.
Perhaps I would’ve been so mentally and physically broken that I wouldn’t
have had the strength to do just that. It
makes my heart hurt for all women who’ve had to endure such assaults. Since I’ve started my professional career
there have been numerous occasions in which I’ve seen gender discrimination in
the workplace. No, it hasn’t been blatant
– but then again, it doesn’t have to be.
I’ve been in meetings in which as the only woman, I’ve been asked to get
the coffee. I’ve made executive
decisions, and then had individuals go to my male counterpart for confirmation. It doesn’t make me a victim – it just means I
have to work that much harder to be successful.
It makes me stronger, and it makes me look for ways in which I can help
other young women succeed in the workplace.
I don’t know if ALL women have faced these issues, but I know for sure,
me and my friends have.
I do believe in this case as with most case a sour apple ruins a bunch. That is to say that there are definelty a majority of men who believe in the b/s that women are somehow inferior or need to treated in a less than equal way. The most I can do as an individual is to treat women equally and try to set the example for those less intellectaul males.
ReplyDeleteIts sad to say but its like a hive mindset, men will whistle at women and treat them like objects because that is how women are portrayed. Its a taught behavior through media and visual study and it gets worse and worse with each generation. Though it is untrue to say all men are the same i think it is important to state that all men are given the same mindset and it is their decision to treat women with respect and be one of the few or treat them like a pair of Jordan's.
ReplyDeleteI have worked a lot of jobs that where very male dominant. First I was a machinist, then an MP in the military to working in a garage changing oil in vehicles. I would say out of all of these the military was the best to work with as far as men. I was also the woman that held up my part and then some just to be ahead of the men, I had respect out of this world with the men I served with. Working in a garage wasn't so great. This guy and I would fight and cuss at each other just about everyday. He finally pushed the wrong button. His words were "all you are is a girl working in a mans garage" well, I punched the crap out of this 6'5 man. After I knocked the wind out of him he said " I don't care if you are a girl I will hit you." So, I stepped up to him and my head probably hit his chest. NOT ONE MAN there had my back. I wasn't going to back down. He was going to have to knock me out. He stepped backed and cussed the whole way as our supervisor was yelling at both of us. He could have really hurt me, but that was just going to have to happen. As far a sexual harassment nothing physical, just a few comments here and there. Not all men suck, but most do.
ReplyDeleteI have definitely felt scared to turn a guy down. felt pressured if a guy bought me drinks to give him something in return, been whistled at, honked at, had my ass grabbed while walking down the street in broad daylight. It's uncomfortable, and that fact that any guy thinks he has the right to do so is the unjust thing here. I understand this is not all guys, but that does not mean all guys should not be working to fix the mentality.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was 12 I was molested by 3 guys in my Hungarian school(Not my American one in Hungary) a teacher walked by as it was happening and did nothing. Later on I got told off for being too much of a flirt by the school. I have told no one about this, except my sister who I only told last year. I was too scared I would get told off for it.
The worst thing is though, if I don't have guys being inappropriate towards me, then I have them telling me how ugly I am, that I think I'm all that, calling me a bitch.
I've been made to feel bad for being a flirtatious person, bringing it on myself, even though I go out of my way to make sure guys know where boundaries were. A few weeks ago I drank too much and went to a friends house that was in walking distance so I wouldn't drive. I was specific in why I was going there telling him I wasn't going to sleep with him. At his place I could barely stand up and was ready to pass out on his couch, but I couldn't because I had to try and fight him off of me, despite saying no multiple times. This was a friend, someone I would describe as a very nice guy, genuine guy, who still turned and had one thought in his head. guys tend to take "No" as a "Please convince me". This is where girls get scared. We should only have to say no once.
America is one of the better countries I've been to in terms of women's rights, but the whole world has a long way to go in terms of understanding just why women feel we need to be weary of men.
Sorry this post is so rambled and kind of jumbled.
Yes! This happens all the time. Even if you're in a group of women. I'm always paying attention to any guys looking or following my friends and I. I've gotten to the point where I'll call them out for looking at us. It's just to scary and sexual predators feed off of your fear.
ReplyDeleteI wasn't always so blunt with guys until my girlfriend and I were shopping at Target. We noticed these two big guys following us around. Every time we would go to another part of the store, they were there. It wasn't like they happened to be looking in the same section. We could see them looking through the racks at us. We grabbed what we needed and got out. Once we were in the car ready to go, we saw the same guys walk out of the store. I've never been so creeped out.
Bethany Blake
i'm one of those people who doesn't watch the news unless its on comedy central..it makes me feel less guilty for laughing at the world. though i never feel guilty for laughing at real news. Typing it to others who are emotional about the subjects does.
ReplyDeletethere is a pro and con to everyone. in this case men get a bad rap for being "aggressive, apathetic, closed minded," all the stereotypical men labels women get a bad rap for being "indecisive, vague, too sensitive" the world won't find equality until everyone has the same eye color,skin tone, political views, hair texture, height, social class e.t.c. life itself isn't fair, we're born not promised anything but living for a little while, so why not sit back and stop worrying. unfortunately other people don't have the ability to not worry like i do. On a final note, without all these bad things happening we won't be able to remember or appreciate the good things in life. whats the use of light, if darkness doesn't exist.
It is very unfortunate in today's society that all women are preyed upon--regardless of social and/or financial status--by a majority of men. I have watched stories unfold on the television about women that range from "drop-dead gorgeous" to utterly ugly, being the victims of sexual abuse/assault from the opposite sex. Most men are likely to express their obsession with sex via verbal and/or physical language. I think men desire control greatly; men also think about sex quite constantly. It doesn't surprise me to see men in either heterosexual or homosexual relationships fail to practice what my fiancé's college preaches--to be a gentleman at all times on and off of school. I think a lot of men think with their penis instead of their brain. This "natural instinct" combined with men's inclination towards control heightens the likelihood of sexual advances towards women or men. In conclusion, I fortunately have not experienced any of these tragedies by #YesAllWomen. Sure, there have been the occasional on-lookers who whistle or maybe say, "can I get your number," to me. Really, I think that men can not only do these things to women but to men as well; also we should not forget about the predatory nature of humans in the first place because there is domestic violence between lesbian couples as well.
ReplyDeleteThough the good guys usually get pegged with the miscreants and it is wrong, there isn't much that can be done about it, unless we can find some way to get all the bad on some type of list or something. this is why its better to judge by their actions not by one experience you had with a person who happens to be of the same gender.
ReplyDeleteI believe that all women go through these situations. I personally have gone through one with an ex boyfriend he was pressuring to have sex with him physically, I obviously wasn't ready, and I finally realized that is all he wanted. As soon I started realizing this I stopped talking to him and he had moved on because I wouldn't put out.
ReplyDeletethis problem will always continue, because we as people are losing our morals and self respect for ourself and indiviuals . we're all brainwashed to have hatred towards one another. we see in our media everyday. until we change as a whole, this problem will never stop…it will only get worse.
ReplyDeletewe see this*
DeleteI feel like most men do get a bad reputation due to the actions of a few. What can be done to change this? To start, stop grouping people in the by their gender. start looking at everyone as equal. The problem is that a lot of people are to stubborn not to group people by gender or see everyone as equal.
ReplyDeleteYea we get bad reps because of a few bad apples. We ALL (ladies and gents) are living in a world where depending on your gender you get a list of standards and double standards to play or be played with.
ReplyDeleteAs a woman who has been raped before it is not the easiest thing to get over. Not all men are evil and would harm a woman. The one thing is that there are a lot of double standards for both genders. We as a society pretty much throw out the moral card. We are all equal but a lot of people do not see it that way and that is pretty ridiculous if you ask me. Women are preyed upon just the same as men.
ReplyDeleteWhen something horrific like that happens it saddens me to a great degree. I'm sad not only for the fact that an incident like this has occurred, but that men are getting angry when people get upset. We should feel saddened then learn from our mistakes not attack others who are critical.
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine someone pain for witnessing something like this and have been raped my heart goes out to the family and the person. Personally I never been in that situation pray a God I don't go through that its crazy how we have sick people in this generation.
ReplyDeleteI feel that men do get bad rap just because of the behavior of other men. I don't necessarily blame those men for their behavior, because we see it everyday and that's all they know. Especially in the media or in the entertainment business. I lived with a single mother for a portion of my life so I have a certain for women.
ReplyDeleteIt is clear that there is a problem with the way women are treated. The rapists are abusers that fill our prisions are the first sign that there is an issue. Not on males behave like this. The actions of these mens come from many contributing factors: the media, personal mental health issues, and how they were brought up. Is the way the treat women just a cycle that they too have witnessed and are just mimicking. Probably. Men need to tell other men this kind of behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated in our society.
ReplyDeleteI have experienced not being equal on my last job because I worked with a punch of men. My supervisor would ask me everyday how did I feel about working with the men in the back and would say I was fine but I guess he wanted me to be smiling and grinning in the men faces instead of coming to work and just do my job. I got fired from the job because I wasn't sociable enough.
ReplyDeleteI think the media and the US in general is a bit too sexual at times. If you turn on a tv you see half naked woman selling a hamburger like Carl Jr ads. It has nothing to do with the burger itself but they sexy woman eating it. I think there are woman out there who let people take advantage of them in tv or magazines. Often pressuring them into showing more skin and being more sexual. This drives men too want what they see and have been promised in a way through advertisements and television. We are certainly stuck in a never ending loop of sex that will most likely never be corrected. In the end you can only be mindful that all woman are human beings and deserve respect as much as any male.
ReplyDeletei do believe each woman has her share of difficulties in society. personally i have never had any experiences myself, and hopefully never will. i have seen women be in commercials like hardy's and i think they could do a much better job to advertise their burgers. my dad warned me about men so am always cautious especially around new people.
ReplyDelete