That same quarter, I had a student do her final project on “rape
culture,” a term that unfortunately is becoming more common, especially when it
comes to minors. Sexual abuse is almost
as common for boys as it is for girls, but often because of how society defines
masculinity, people have trouble acknowledging male victims. Consider that Josh Brolin has also gone on
record saying he was 11 when he lost his virginity, and he attributed his young
age to “general teen wildness.” Dave
Navarro has also stated he was 13 when he lost his virginity and it made him
feel “like a king”.
I know as a female, most of us grew up with parents and
other adults giving us advice on how to avoid situations that may lead to rape:
“Don’t walk alone at night.” “Don’t accept drinks or rides from strangers.”
“Leave with who you came with”. “Be alert, especially when you’re walking alone”. So my first question for this week is for the
guys, “What, if anything were you told about rape growing up? Who talked to you about it – your teachers,
your parents, or your friends?” For
everyone I would like to know, “Do you view male sexual abuse differently than
female sexual abuse? Be honest! What makes you feel the way you do?” Answers are due no later than Tuesday,
October 22nd, 2013Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Defining a Culture of Rape
Last week, I was shocked when I read about an interview
Chris Brown gave to Vanity Fair, in which he divulged that he lost his
virginity at the age of 8 to a girl who was 14 or 15 years old. When asked by the interviewer about being so
young, it was reported that Chris grinned and chuckled and said, “It’s
different in the country”. The sad fact
is that whether he realizes it or not, what Brown described is rape. A few quarters ago, I blogged about the Ohio
rape case that garnered national attention, when the high school aged rapist
took photos and videos while in the act, and then shared them with other
students on social media. You can read
my thoughts on that case and your fellow students’ comments here: http://historicalandpoliticalissues.blogspot.com/2013/04/take-back-our-nights-take-baqck-our.html
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I believe rape is rape,whether it's a female or male. Like you stated earlier males might feel more of the embarrassment because they feel like it takes away their masculinity. But either way both feel violated and go through the same things after wards.
ReplyDelete-Bezawit Enyew
I think sexual abuse is all the same. But honestly the younger generations are getting more into sexual acts and desires due to what they are exposed to in their environment. They do not think it is rape they actually think is cool because everybody else is doing it!
ReplyDeletePersonally I learned about what rape really was from friends that went through it. I dated a guy in high school that was a victim. One parent sold him to their friends for drugs. Rape is rape regardless of what sex the victim is. If one of the two within the act says no at all it should not happen. Almost every friend that I had that was a girl that went through this has told me that they told the guy no but they didn't bash the guy in the head with a lamb because he was stronger then them and already mad them feel they had no choice. Abuse is abuse no matter which way you try to spen it. Things like this should not happen to anyone. It annoys me when people try to belittle some cases just because it wasn't a major struggle to get away or they were in a relationship together so it was consensual or they are a guy so it isn't possible for them to be raped and they are just going to tell the world they enjoyed it or any reason at all.
ReplyDeleteI was still quite young (I can't remember my exact age so forgive me; it was a long time ago) when I first learned of the word rape was. If you were to ask my parents they would tell you that I was an inquisitive child and when I didn't understand what something was I sought an answer. Admittedly, I did not turn to my parents for an answer but rather ironically to an old Webster's dictionary that included certain legal terms. I had learned the word "rape" from a news broadcast I happened to overhear on the television while flipping through channels and when I looked up the definition (keeping in mind this was an older addition of the Webster's dictionary) it defined "rape" roughly as committing sexual intercourse against the will of the second party (victim). I of course had already come to understand various things about sexuality by this age and I was able to understand what this definition was stating, though admittedly only after I looked up the unfamiliar words it used. I would later hear some of my fellow students in school using the word as a constant bad joke, and I found it rather annoying considering that they were making light of a very serious offense and crime. I often wanted to speak out against them, but sadly they were all too jaded and ignorant to care. While in elementary school we were never told anything to do with these sort of things as they deemed us too old. It would not be later while in high school that this crime and other sexual offenses were discussed in a class setting. Typically, due to the obvious gender roles that have been placed upon men and women since before recorded history, men are viewed as the more domineering and forceful of the two genders and women as the more nurturing and gentle of the two (keep in mind that I do not necessarily support this view of the genders as I have met plenty of very forceful and domineering women that would put men to shame). Regardless, as far as there being a difference between male and female sexual abuse; no, I do not as sexual abuse is sexual abuse regardless of the gender of the victim. It is true that very few male rape/molestation victims are willing to come forward due to feeling humiliated or because they do not view what happened to them as rape; this being the case when an older female figure is the "rapist" and the victim being a younger male individual who "consents" to the act. While the exact definition of "rape" in law terms has changed, also adding in other related law terms such as child molestation, statutory rape, sexual assault, etc the fact remains that part of the problem is that sex crimes are...well...rampant in the United States. There may be other countries that are worse off in terms of sex crimes but I these would likely be third world countries with weak infrastructure and next to no law and order. I have known and spoken to individuals that have been victims of sexual abuse. They would know what happened to them was sexual abuse, but due to coming from unstable families and other family affairs were either unwilling to tell members of their family or the police. In cases of male sex abuse victims they are slower and less likely to admit to being sexually abused, and generally will only view sex abuse as sex abuse when they are being abused by another male figure. As graphic as this statement is, it does happen. There are cases of statutory rape in which an older individual will have a relationship with a minor, which would be classified as statutory rape. There are cases of this in which both parties participate willingly. While we can carry on about sex crimes in general the fact is that "rape culture" in the United States is virtually inseparable from its "sex culture" and that the two should be discussed together as it is our country's sex culture that largely impacts the "rape culture".
ReplyDeleteThe first time I heard about rape I was probably 10 or 11 I heard it on the news. I feel that rape is the same male or female. It saddens me that rape is being normalized each and every day. That young boys who are raped see it as being more manly and that they should embrace it. This to me just signifies the lack of sexual education. We clearly needed to inform our youth better. The word rape is used so carelessly and it really needs to stop. It upsets me when I hear gamers throw the word around saying things like "dude you got raped". We need create a mind set that rape is as bad as murder or canabalism and maybe we can stop this downward spiral.
ReplyDeleteIn a way I do feel that it is different from males and females. Yea, rape is rape, but I also feel that men have more power over a woman when it comes to raping someone. I feel thats why I hear most parents teach their sons to respect women while parents with daughters teach them to keep their legs closed. Even though it might not be the case that its always the males fault, I do feel that it most likely always is.
ReplyDeleteI feel like rape is a crime regardless of who it is against. However, I also feel that while male rape is a problem, rape of women and children is an epidemic. It's disgusting that this country normalizes rape and blames the victims for it or shrugs it off as not really doing harm. It does harm. It can destroy a person for the rest of their lives.
ReplyDeleteKatherine Fosso
Growing up I was told probably the same as most kids that I shouldn't talk to strangers or take rides from them. I was told if someone touched me or said something that made me feel uncomfortable to let my mom or brother know what happened. I didn't really think about male rape before it started coming up in the news in the last few years. I think no matter if it's a male or a female forcing yourself on someone or making someone think they want something that they do not want is unacceptable.
ReplyDeleteAs a child I honestly did not learn much about rape from others directly, I learned more about it on my own or from watching movies and going into further detail by research on my own. My mom and dad have always told me the basics , never talk to strangers, as an adult ,never let someone make you a drink, bring you a drink, or walk away from your drink. They never told me why, then or now, but I always knew what the outcome could possibly be if I did any of them above. I do feel like male sexual abuse is the same as female abuse, I feel like the society naturally doesn't feel that way or acknowledge it as they do. I personally know men that have went through such acts and are very messed up from them. ~Marissa
ReplyDeleteWhen I really think about it i view it as rape. This may seem contradictory but when I first heard the Chris Brown comment I didnt associated it with rape. I think when a boy loses his virginity at a young age with a older girl the focus doesnt go straight to actual age of the girl. It mostly goes to disbelief of how young the boy is in the situation. Boys look at it as "being the man" like in the same sense of Chris Brown.
ReplyDeleteI agree with previous comments about that we as children werent tought much about rape. We heard more in the news about rape. We were tought as kids about good touch and bad touch and most of this was taught at school. We need to inform our kids more about this situation like this so they can be aware. We need to teach our kids to communicate with us no matter what.
ReplyDeleteI believe that rape is the same no matter who it's forced on. It's less common to hear about males being raped though, maybe because in our society nowadays, we think that all males want to do is have sex when in reality, that is far from the case. And now, with more and more people having sex at a younger and younger age, sex is way more common and may not exactly be seen as rape. It is sad to think about our generation
ReplyDeleteGrowing up, my parents always warned me about taking candy from strangers and told me never to get in a car with a stranger, but they never told me why. They just said it was bad and left it at that. I most definitely do not view male sexual abuse any different abuse agains women. If fact I think it's worse in most cases because it's viewed as part of a males masculinity and praised by their friends. I believe this allows a negative effect on a males view toward women, allowing their judgement to be skewed into thinking,"Hey, it was alright when they did it to me - so what's the difference of me doing it to a female?"
ReplyDelete